The Eternal Dream
.....As my dog got older, he tends to sleep more and I noticed he dreams a lot. His legs in varied intensities of movement, sometimes just a little, and lots of times a full out run simulation. When he's flailing to the max, I'm amazed he doesn't wake himself up. I can tell he's enjoying himself in his dreams, hiking the forest is his favorite thing to do. Even though his hind legs are shot, and his walking is labored and slow, he's still eager to get in the car and go for a hike somewhere. We always make sure he gets his quality experiences in on a daily basis.
In his dreams though, he's a free spirit, he can run as fast as he wants, like when he was young. I sometimes see him dream several times per day.
Its a Saturday afternoon, my Rocky has dreamt twice already. The day before was the last day he was able to walk a few steps. His diagnosis by the vet had them tell me he only has a few days left, and I should make my arrangements. I knew this was coming, and I dreaded the thought of it very much, but I don't want him to suffer. Rocky is laying on the living room floor on his bed next to the cushion I laid on holding him all thru previous night. The doctor arrives and instructs to Michelle and I how things will go.
I'm laying down holding Rocky, massaging his neck while gazing into his eyes, and his eyes are gazing into mine. I tell him I love him and will miss him very much, my eyes were saying much more that words cannot express. I give the go ahead for the doctor to inject the first shot that puts him into a deep anesthesia sleep. His eyes get groggy, and his eyes fade from mine. It didn't take long for him to go into one of his magical dreams, legs trotting along. I imagine Michelle and I were with him in his dream, we do everything together with lots of hiking. His leg movements then faded off, breathing in a deep sleep. The doctor then hand signals me if its OK to give the final shot, I give her the thumbs up. His breathing stopped soon thereafter.
After the doctor left we held each other tight in the kitchen and cried a lot. He is our world, we do everything together. The day before, I prepared and dug a deep hole under an old walnut tree in the back yard. I put my wrist band on his front leg, and my bandana on his collar. We wrapped him up in a blanket and placed him in the hole. We put his things in next to him, bowls, leash, bone snacks and such like a great pharaoh. We placed another blanket on top of him, then filling the hole, and a nice stone on top. Michelle placed a bead necklace she made on top of the stone. We had beers at his graveside, reminiscing about all the great adventures we had together.
I cried for 3 days, and I still get teared up thinking about my best bud. It will take some time to heal for sure. I'll never forget him, he was always a faithful companion even in my darkest time, he made a huge impact on me. I do feel very happy we were able to give him the most awesome life.
I feel his spirit is still here, our bond is so strong. My beautiful dreamer is in an eternal dream now, still with me, forever. - Keith
ROCKY - March 20, 2007 - November 5, 2022